So once again im disappointed. My cousin Jake was supposed to come up here for my graduation. That was the most exciting thing to me. It was like wow my big brother is comming up. I wanted him to meet my friends and see where im from. That would have been the best gift ever. But then I find out from my other cousin, his sister, that hes not coming because his ugly ass girlfriend is pregnant. He didnt even have the balls to tell me and I invited her too just because I wanted him here. Hes been promising me since September he was comming. We're so close and I havent seen him since I was 15. Im about to turn 18 that was three years ago. He wont answer my calls or my text messages. I feel like he doesnt want me anymore. It feels like he doesnt love me anymore. Like how do you not even have the decency to call and tell me yourself. If she didnt tell me were you gonna tell me. You cant just get my hopes up like that. Especially when you know that you are one of the only older people I trust. Im not even close to my sisters. They werent there for me the way he was. Anytime I needed something he was always there. I really wanted him there. I wanted him of all people to be proud of me. I wanted him to see that I overcame everything he pushed me through and I made it. This adds more to the fact that I feel alone. Its like nobody needs me at all. I just wish time would stop for a moment so that I have time to take everything in. Damn I just really need a hug right now... I dont care from who but I need to know somebody cares...
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